Learn to love who YOU are - by Lady Lou

Woman spend a hell of a lot of time and energy wanting things they don’t have.  For example - if your hair is straight you want it curly, if your short you want to be tall, if you have big boobs you want smaller boobs, if you have big hips you want to have none.  The list goes on and on and on and on and on.  If at some time you learn how to make it STOP and be happy with what you’ve got. I can guarantee your life will change for the better.

Here’s a little story I often tell in my Workshops because it helps the ladies to understand one of the most simple principles of Burlesque - "To love who you are".

When I was preparing for my first time on stage I was extremely nervous and unsure about taking my clothes of in front of a live audience.  As most women do I thought my body was not fit enough for this task.  My ass and thighs were too big and had way too much cellulite on them to be any where near attractive.  In order to get up there and do it I had to tell myself that: If there are other performers with imperfections getting up there and doing it, then so can I.

During my performance a managed to push all of those body issues aside and just enjoy that moment of proudly showing the audience my beautiful performance which I put my heart and soul into creating.  I also had to remember the most important thing is to have fun up there!  For when you are enjoying yourself and proud of what you do, your smile is pure and your heart is open.  That's when the magic happens and the audience are delighted by your presence.

After my performance there were women coming up to me.  These were gorgeous women with great bodies, and perfect skin.  They were saying "Wow what a great show!  You have such an amazing body, I wish I could have a body like that and know how to use it".  I thought to myself - wait a minute... these ladies are much more beautiful than I am and yet they look up to me as pretty one.  How can this be?  Is beauty simply an illusion?

Burlesque is an art form that is challenging the current notion of what "beauty" is.  We have been programmed to think that things like firm, flawless, and slim are what makes us beautiful.  But if a woman learns how to say "fuck you" to those demands and finds her own individual way of expressing how she is beautiful.  This is a very powerful message she sends to her audience. 

Here is one of my favorite quotes from Holly J'aDoll (Australian Burlesque Performer) it says it all... "Never worry about what the people around you are doing -there's no point in trying to emulate someone else's style. Value your uniqueness and capabilities and invest in those things. Confidence doesn't come from being admired. Confidence comes from being the most authentic and high-end version of yourself that you can possibly be".

So basically my conclusion is that beauty is all in your head.  Stop wanting what you don't have, accept what you do and love it, then people will love you in return - easy!

                                                     photo: http://www.heinrichvonschimmer.de

Girls it's time to WALK THE WALK - by Lady Lou

After receiving an overwhelming amount of positive feedback for my recent blog "Learn to love who YOU are" I have been inspired to keep writing about my personal experiences, discoveries and journeys as Burlesque Performer, Burlesque Teacher, and Mother.

People often ask me: What kind of women come to your Burlesque workshops and why?  My answer is that 85% of my students are "normal" women who don't necessarily want to be Burlesque performers.  Instead most of them are on a personal endeavor to reconnect with their inner feminine side.  I hear so many of them saying I have forgotten how it feels to be feminine.  For as grown up modern day women we have been given the freedom of choice and this has lead us to become preoccupied with trying to achieve as much as we possibly can because we can!  We study, work, strive for a better career, follow fashion, have a social life, have babies, maintain the household, and are constantly trying to prove that we can manage everything. 

Along the way we have discovered that it is much easier to complete these tasks while being disguised as a man.  For if you want to be taken seriously in life you shouldn't go around looking feminine and sexy., otherwise people might think your less intelligent and not to be trusted.  We feel more comfortable in jeans and T.shirt because then we can blend into our environment and get on with life without being judged by people. 

Just let me explain that I'm not saying we should all be like Dita Von Tease and dress impeccably from head to toe every time we step out into the public.  This is totally impractical for most women, including myself.  Getting on my bike every morning and taking my son to kita while trying to pull off the Dita look would be ridiculous, uncomfortable and not to mention extremely embarrassing for my son.  But when I have my "own time" like meeting friends, going to concerts, performing at events, if I'm in the mood I like to have the freedom of choosing weather or not I will dress up.

Many times I've had students who have said "I wish I was able to dress up like that when I go out".  It's important to understand that when they say "like that" they aren't talking about mini skirts, fish net tights, knee high boots and a low cut top.  They are talking about simply wearing a dress, high heels, curls in the hair and red lipstick.  So what's stopping them?  They say it's because they don't want to draw attention to themselves.  Apparently it's bad if you walk into a room and everyone is looking at you because you are dressed differently.  I know this situation very well, walking into to a hip Berlin bar where it's cool to look like you don't give a damn.  Then there's me walking in all dressed up like I'm about to win an award at the Oscars.  Yes they look (especially the girls) but I don't care, in fact I quite like it.  I like it because I put a lot of time and effort into this outfit and would be disappointed if it went completely unnoticed.  It doesn't mean I want to steal your boyfriend or have the attention of every man in the bar.  I do it for myself because it makes me feel like a gorgeous woman and I'm proud of it!  I usually find that during the course of the night the girls who were looking at me in a strange way are the ones who later come over to give me a compliment. 

The next time you feel like dressing up remember that it is important to find your own style.  Try not to be safe and follow current trends, screw the trends I say!  Wear what makes you happy.  If you ask me the fashion industry has too much power over the way women see themselves.  It shouldn’t be fashion creating you - it should be you creating fashion according to you.  Make getting ready to go out a fun experience, have a glass of wine put some music on, invite a friend over, get creative, wear something that reflects your mood, be daring, be bold, be beautiful.  Life is too short to blend into the wallpaper while looking out and thinking I wish I could have as much fun as her.  I'm sure you've all heard your Mothers, Grandmother, Aunties saying enjoy your youthful looks while you have them, before you know it they are gone.  When I look back at some of the crazy outfits I have worn through out my life I cringe and think "Oh my god now I know why those people were staring at me!  Did I really wear that?"  But my philosophy in life is - it's better to regret something you've done, rather than regretting something you never had the balls to try. 

You can tell a lot about how a person is feeling just by the way they move.  I have a helpful technique that I teach my students about how to overcome that feeling of wanting to disappear into a crack in the ground when people are looking at you. It's called learning how to Walk the Walk!  It's amazing how much confidence one can gain just by walking in a strong but feminine way. 

So here it is... lifting the chest, relax and find movement in the shoulders, don't look down, make eye contact, smile, wiggle the hips, extend the legs and you've got it!  It's amazing the transformation I see my students go through when they start to feel the power of The Walk.  So next time you step into that bar and want to appear more confident, feminine and sexy you can do this by simple walking from one side of the room to the other.  Not only will you appear more confident but you will start to also feel and believe it - WALK THE WALK GIRLS work it baby work it!

Photo: Photo-Huntress 2.0


Photo: Nina Zimmermann.com - Dr Sketchy’s Berlin

The Wonderful World of the Erotic Female Fantasy - by Lady Lou

Recently I came up with any interesting theory that may answer the question: Why at a Burlesque event is it the women more than the men that are captivated while watching a Burlesque performer take her clothes off?  My answer: It's because Burlesque allows women to express their erotic fantasies without judgment or limitations and it isn’t only about satisfying the sexual needs of men.

The other night I was dinning with a group of friends and the topic of pornography came up.  I was delighted for this gave me a chance to ask the men at the table a question that has always been on my mind... "Why is the acting and narrative in porn movies always so shockingly bad?".  It's like the makers of porn want it this way, I mean seriously how difficult can it be to put a story together that actually makes sense and attempts to be even slightly entertaining?  The men at the table all laughed and said "It's because nobody watches the story, we all just skip straight to the sex!".  Hhhmmm this could explain a lot, not only about the bad acting but about the differences between women and men when it comes to sex and why a lot of women fall in love with Burlesque.  For example the narrative part at the beginning of a porn movie is important for me.  I like to know what the setting is, who the characters are and what roles they play.  This way I can enter their world and become a part of the fantasy.  Which is what a Burlesque performer is doing, she is transporting the audience to a world where she explores her own erotic fantasy.  Therefore the men in the audience become spectators while the women in the audience can immerse themselves in the performance and seek inspiration for their own wishes and desires.

Most men are relatively simple when it come to sex: women, man, naked, kiss, touch, sex, orgasm, sleep.  But for women it's a much more intricate process, often we enjoy the play more than we do the actual sex and I'm not talking just about foreplay.  Sometimes it's the chase alone that can get us going, that primal instinct of being the hunter or the hunted.  That game of give and take, teasing, flirting, giving a little but not too much, slowly building up that sexual tension which at some point you know will explode into the first kiss of the evening.  We love to play this game and fantasies about what kind of role he will play tonight - the bad boy, the romantic, the hero, what will I wear, how he will smell, what music will be playing.  These fantasies can go on and on and on, but at some point they are interrupted by a not so romantic reality.  Burlesque is a chance for women to unashamedly bask in that beautiful world of the erotic female fantasy with no interruptions.

For decades satisfying ones sexual desires was assumed only to be necessary for men, and so came Strip Clubs, Pornography, Live Internet & Phone Sex which mostly cater to the needs of men.  But what about women?  Why do men get to have all of the fun?  Just because we don't have excess testosterone pumping through our veins every day, doesn't mean that we don't like to delve into our own erotic fantasies.   I would just like to say "It is IMPORTANT for women to explore this part of themselves"  For example when a women comes to my workshop to learn Burlesque with the intension of performing for her man.  I explain to her that Burlesque is not necessarily about pleasing your man and thinking about what will turn him on.  It's about taking the time to explore your own sexuality, discover what will turn YOU on.  Burlesque gives you the outlet to express yourself in a way that is comfortable, beautiful and fun.  It's a chance for you to act out all of those wonderful female desires - costumes, makeup, music, scent, taste, lighting, themes, play, toys.  You get to choose what character you want to play and what fantasy you want to explore.  In the mean time your partner is under your spell, he sits, watches, obeys, enjoys, but no touching until you tell him your ready.  For most women this is an extremely empowering experience and when they discover this confidence it has a positive impact not only in the bedroom but in the rest of their lives (and the bonus is that their men like it too). 

I think it's important for women to stop thinking that they have to be sexy for men, but instead take the time to be sexy for themselves.  You have a right to enjoy and explore your own fantasies and see what wonderful experiences await you!

Photo by: Markus Essner

Flirt with Life - by Lady Lou


Go on try it - have a "Flirt with Life Day" and see what happens.  Wear                   

something that makes you feel special, walk with your shoulders back

and your chin up.  Smile, be open to conversation, lightly touch someone

on the arm while talking to them, batter your eyelashes, giggle, laugh and

enjoy yourself. 

Sometimes flirting can have a negative association because people think                 

it leads to sex.  But it can also simply be a playful approach to your 

sexuality and the world around you without sex coming into it at all.

Flirting doesn't only have to be about attracting a man, why not flirt with a

women? It can be a lot of fun.  It doesn't mean you are gay, it simply

means you enjoy life and enjoy people.

Why not try flirting with yourself? If a women can be happy with herself

and can connect with her desires.  Then have the confidence to                   

communicate her needs she will discover a new kind of strength and

feeling of being alive.  People will see this in her eyes, her laughter and   

every movement of her body.   They will be attracted to her radiance and

are magnetized by her energy and confidence. 

Flirting can be fun!

Simple Stage Tips for Burlesque Beginners - by Lady Lou

Slow down: When you are nervous you will operate at double speed! While performing say to yourself "slow down" this will also help you to relax.  Take a moment while you are on stage to enjoy the achievement and feeling of being up there.  If your not enjoying being up there you can’t expect your audience to enjoy watching you - it works both ways!

Using the stage: Try to use all of the stage.  Go up, down, side, front and back.  Engage the audience not only in the front but also to your left and right.  Give the everyone in the room the feeling that you are there for them.

Eye contact: Making direct eye contact with members of your audience at certain points of your performance can be very effective.  If you are not confident enough to make eye contact, look over the heads of your audience.  This gives the illusion that you are looking at someone but you won’t loose your focus while performing.

Posture and Face Expression: Burlesque is multitasking at it's finest.  You have to remember your dance choreography, acting, gracefully taking off a complicated costume, using accessories, timing and connecting with the audience all compact into about 5:30 minutes!  Sometimes amongst all of these things it is easy to forget Posture and Face Expression.  Remember to lift your chest and keep the shoulders pushed back slightly.  But make sure your shoulders are not too hard and rigid.  Instead try to create soft, subtle, flowing movements that go from your shoulders down to your arms.  Don't forget to soften the face!! If you are nervous or stressed the tension will show here.  This can create extremely uncomfortable and awkward facial expressions.  Sometimes simply relaxing the muscles in your face and shoulders can release the tension from your whole body and calm you down.

Know your music: You need to know every single beat and change in your music.  Listen to it even when you are not practicing, so you know it inside and out.  Make sure there are anchor points in the song that tell you what to do and when e.g taking something off, changing your mood, changing your position on stage, picking up an accessory.

Making a mistake: If you make a mistake try not to show it in your face, expression or body language.  Most of the time it's only you that knows there was a mistake.  Just try to keep going and the audience will have no idea.  If it’s REALLY obvious then laugh about it, make a joke, giggle, incorporate it into the act and your audience will love your for it.  Sometimes mistakes can be the most creative and favorite part of the choreography!

Exiting Stage: You’ve worked hard to get to that stage so don't run away as soon as your music has finished.  Stay and enjoy the applause that you deserve!  Bow after your performance and thank the audience for supporting you. DO NOT pick your costume up from the stage – you are the Star of the show not the House Keeper.  Before the show you should always arrange a reliable person to do it for you.  When exiting the stage you are still performing as long as the audience can see you. If you have to walk through the audience to get to the backstage put on your best showgirl walk and stay in character until you are safely behind closed doors, then you can relax and celebrate your victory!

photo: http://www.heinrichvonschimmer.de

Broken Mirror

For the last months I have been busy creating a new act called Broken Mirror.  Now that it is finally finished I can spare a moment to tell you about it. 

This act is different from anything I have ever done before.  Like most Burlesque performers I am used to creating beautiful, funny, creative shows that aim to provide light-hearted, feel good entertainment for any party.  But this time I decided to set a different challenge for myself.  I wanted to use the opportunity of being on stage to tell an important story, and one that is very close to my heart. 

Within the European Burlesque scene there has been a gradual shift happening.  There is a rising popularity of what I call "Uber Glamour" - MORE Rhinestones, MORE feathers, MORE beauty, MORE perfection, MORE MORE MORE.  So I felt like it is a good time to make a performance that talks about another side of Burlesque that needs to be protected and nurtured among the mountains of glitter and feathers. 

Last year I was performing with one of Europe's top class Burlesque Glamour Girls, she has thousands of followers, glitter, and a killer body.  While waiting backstage she said to me "I hate it when performers say that Burlesque is about loving your body and is for all different shapes and sizes.  I think that is bull shit."  I was extremely disappointed to hear this coming from such an iconic performer or from any Burlesque performer for that matter. For if you look at other forms of dance where the focus is on body perfection the girls are extremely screwed up, and bitchy because of it.  For me Burlesque always stood out as welcoming both body perfection and imperfections, as long as the performer is good and can put on a damn good show then she is welcome big hips, or no hips, big boobs, or no boobs.  Also this variety in body shapes and talent makes a Burlesque show more interesting to watch. 

Nowadays thinking negatively and criticizing our own bodies is considered "normal".  This is partly due to the consumer driven society in which we live and the companies that are getting rich from our body insecurities.  These are the one's who are only too happy to add fuel to our self-destructive fire.

Or alternatively a typical scenario that I'm sure you all know is when your hanging out with a group of girlfriends and the conversation ends up with everyone talking about how much weight they have gained, or how many wrinkles they have, or how their hair is so wrong. This negativity is not only self-destructive it is also infectious.  You might not realize it at the time but it is likely that you are taking their problems and subconsciously adding them to your own long list of things to be paranoid about.

Imagine the surprise if in this moment there was one girl in the group who stood up and said, "I love my body even though it's not perfect!" Then proceeded to happily show everyone her beautiful body parts and favourite features.  In most circles of friends (and in my world before Burlesque) this behaviour would be considered very strange.  The first woman I ever saw doing this was a Burlesque performer.  I was instantly inspired and drawn to her for she was beautiful, powerful, sexy, and had a round feminine body with parts that wibbled and wobbled while she danced and for me that made her human.  I could see myself in her and I loved what I saw.  She gave me the confidence to try Burlesque and make new positive discoveries about myself.  Now that I am a Burlesque Performer and Teacher it is my greatest honour to have the opportunity to inspire woman in the same way.

The transformation that I see so many of my students go through is AMAZING.  Simply through the use of irony, laughter, flirting, and fun they learn to let down the barriers.  Start to peel off their clothing and layers that hide their bodies and for the first time they look at themselves with positivity and love.   This is when the magic happens and they become so much stronger within themselves and within many other aspects of their life.  So please don't tell me that is bull shit!  That is one of the beauties of Burlesque!

Broken Mirror is about a mental illness that effects a lot of women in one form or another, it is called Body Dysmorphic Disorder (copied from Wikipedia): "BDD is a type of mental illness, a somatoform disorder, wherein the affected person is concerned with body image, manifested as excessive concern about and preoccupation with a perceived defect of their physical features. The person thinks they have a defect in either one feature or several features of their body, which causes psychological distress that can lead to clinically significant distress or impairs occupational or social functioning." 

It is a proven fact that when a woman stands in front of a mirror it is difficult for her to see a true reflection.  What we see standing before us is someone older, fatter, and uglier.  Sometimes our imperfections become magnified so dramatically that it is impossible to see the positives.  This can have a huge impact on one's life and hold us back from realizing our true potential. 

Broken Mirror is about a woman's journey to discovering how beautiful and unique she really is.

For more photos go to: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10151745958704810.1073741829.205989199809&type=1

Photo: Paul Green

After 9 years of trying all sorts of different ways to achieve the perfect pin-up style and 6 years of teaching woman how to feel good about their bodies through Burlesque. I have decided it is time to share some of my tips and tricks by posting a Lady Lou Beautiful Body Tip every couple of days. Lets see how far I get? Here we go...

Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #1

DON’T FOLLOW FASHION TRENDS wear clothes that are comfortable and that make you feel happy. Work with your body, not against it. For example you don't HAVE to squeeze your ass into those low waist skinny jeans just because everyone else is wearing them. If they make you feel fat then throw them away NOW! If you're putting off buying new clothes until you like your body better -- don't. Wearing clothes that fit you right now and compliment your figure will send a powerful message to yourself and others that you are worth it and you are GORGEOUS just the way your are.

----------- Höre nicht auf Modetrends und -diktate! Trage Kleidung, die angenehm zu tragen ist und Dich glücklich macht. Arbeite mit Deinem Körper zusammen, nicht gegen ihn. Zum Beispiel besteht kein Grund dazu, Deinen Po in irgendwelche hautengen Hüfthosen zu quetschen, nur weil die ganze Welt sie trägt. Wenn Du Dich darin dick fühlst – wirf sie raus. JETZT SOFORT! Falls Du das Kaufen neuer Klamotten immer weiter aufschiebst, bis Du vielleicht endlich irgendwann Deinen Körper wieder lieber magst – Hör auf damit. Denn wenn Du Kleidung trägst, die Dir jetzt in diesem Moment genau passt und Deiner Figur schmeichelt, wird das eine sehr starke Aussagekraft haben – für Dich selbst und andere. Nämlich: Du bist es Dir selbst wert, und außerdem bist Du hinreißend schön, genau so, wie Du bist.


Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #2

SHOW OFF YOUR CURVES  Have you ever wanted to wear a form fitting Pinup Pencil dress but avoided it because your body is not the right shape?  Here's the answer - body forming underwear, pushup bras, control tights and corsets! You can can easily enhance your curves and posture to achieve that knock out femme fatale form.  How do you think the women in the 50s achieved that hour glass figure?  It was all about the underwear.  Not only does a vintage style Body or Garter belt with straps and stockings look sophisticated and sexy it also helps to hold everything in place, and cinches the waist in.  This way you can wear your Pencil Dress with confidence, show off your feminine curves.  Yes we have hips, yes we have an ass, yes we have thighs - BECAUSE YOUR A WOMAN.  So don't hide it be proud of it work it baby work it.

-----------  Zeige Deine Kurven! Wolltest Du schon lange einmal ein figurbetontes Pin-up Bleistiftkleid tragen, hast es aber vermieden, weil Deine Figur dafür nicht gemacht zu sein scheint? Hier ist die Lösung: figurformende Unterwäsche, Push-up BHs, stützende Strumpfhosen und Korsetts! Damit kannst Du ganz einfach Deine Kurven vervollkommnen und Deine Haltung verbessern, um jene gewisse umwerfende Femme-Fatale-Figur zu erreichen. Wie haben wohl die Frauen in den 50ern ihre Wespentaille hinbekommen? Durch entsprechende Unterbekleidung! Ein Body oder Strapshalter im Vintage Look sieht nicht nur raffiniert und sexy aus, sondern hält auch alles zusammen und schmälert die Taille. So kannst Du Dein Bleistiftkleid mit Selbstbewusstsein tragen und gleichzeitig Deine weiblichen Kurven zeigen. Ja, wir haben Hüfte, ja, wir haben einen Hintern, ja, wir haben Oberschenkel – WEIL WIR FRAUEN SIND! Also sei stolz darauf und verstecke sie nicht: Mach’ was draus!


Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #3

LET’S STOP THE BITCHING It's true when they say that women are their own worst enemy.  I would like to tell you a little story... It was around 18/19 years old and like most young woman I was FULL of insecurities.  Every Friday night my friends and I had a regular ritual where we would dress up and drive into town ready for a big night out.  Before we would go into the club we would sit in the car and drink a bottle of wine while bitching about all of the girls walking past.  Or worse - about the girls we were about to meet and hang out with in the club.  One night a friend said "Why don't we try something else?  Let's think of a nice compliment to say about every woman we see".  Wow!  That night was the best night we ever had in that shitty club.  From that point on we tried our very best not to bitch about other woman and my life turned around completely.  I discovered that I had built a wall around me because I was in a constant state of fear and paranoia that other girls were bitching about me the same way I would bitch about them.  It was like war, attack or be attacked.  After I decided to stop the constant bitching I got more confidence and had less insecurities - Great!

The next time one of your girlfriends starts body bitching (or bitching in general) about someone else shut them down immediately by either changing the subject or in a polite way telling them you don't want to hear it.  If your friends take offense, start to treat you differently or even have nothing else to say.  Then it's clear that they are not the type of people you should have in your life on a regular basis (or at all).  Try to create a network of girlfriends that engage in a heathy and positive body dialogue.  Sometimes these women can be hard to find, but they are out there! 


Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #4

It's time for FLIRTY FRIDAY! Flirting makes us feel alive because it releases dopamine, serotonin, and adrenaline from your body. These chemicals and hormones will help you to feel happy, confident, younger, sexy and best of all irresistible! Share that positive energy and connect with the people around you, everyone loves the feeling of being wanted.

Wear something that makes you feel special, walk with your shoulders back and your chin up. Smile, be open to conversation, lightly touch someone on the arm while talking to them, batter your eyelashes, giggle, laugh and enjoy it.

Or try flirting with yourself! Tell yourself a joke, make up a funny game that only you know your playing, wear something super sexy under your dress without telling anyone, buy a new sex toy. If a women can be happy with herself and can connect with her desires. She will discover a new kind of strength and feeling of being alive. People will see this in her eyes, her laughter and every movement of her body. They will be attracted to her radiance and are magnetized by her energy and confidence.

Happy FLIRTY FRIDAY everyone! May it be full of exciting adventures.


Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #5

PERFECT PIN UP CURLS Here's the secret to getting those perfect Pinup curls in your hair. I have spent many years struggling to find the best way to curl my very straight hair. I've tried everything - hot curling irons, hot curlers, velcro rollers, flat iron, blow-dry cap. Not only did the hot iron and curlers burn and ruin fragile colored hair. I would spend at least 1 hour curling my whole head. Then less than half way through the night the curls would have completely fallen out, leaving me with a messy bird nest look. Hhhhmmm extremely annoying! And then I discovered the old fashioned Foam Rollers that our Grandmothers would use for the over night set and voilà! Perfect curls that last all night and I don't burn my hair to achieve them.  If you try the overnight set make sure you post a picture. I would love to see the results. May the curls be with you! 

Here is the best youtube Tutorial for the foam roller overnight set: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MyVKmiLSm8M


Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #6:

FAKING IT IS THE NEW WAY OF MAKING IT No I'm not talking about the female orgasm, I'm talking about confidence.  Most woman are A LOT more beautiful than they realize.  But many of us don't allow ourselves see it or believe it.  By faking confidence in yourself you will eventually turn those bad body thoughts into good ones.  So tell yourself that you are beautiful, even if you don't believe it. The psychology behind this technique is called "cognitive behavioral therapy," a method that psychologists and therapists use to stop negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones instead.  You can try writing down 5 things you love about your appearance, place them somewhere close to your main mirror or where you get dressed in the morning.  Take the time to look at them and repeat them out loud or just to yourself, like a mantra.  So when that nasty little negative voice in your head starts telling you that your ugly, fat, and generally not good enough.  Squash it immediately with your new beautiful body mantra! 


Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #7:

EYEBROWS STENCILS When I see a girl with big, bold, defined eyebrows I have to admit I do get very excited and try my best to talk to her as long as possible just so I can stare at her beautiful bold-brows (I guess you could call it a Bold-Brow fetish).  If you have ever tried to draw on bold-brows to go with your pinup look you'll know that it's not as easy as it looks, and can sometimes take forever to get that perfect shape.  Recently I purchased a eyebrow stencil kit which makes the whole process a little easier.  Here is a tutorial to show you how: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDafulRX65A


Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #8:

GROWING OLD IS COMPULSORY, ALTHOUGH GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. This is a wonderful view on life but sadly it is hard for most woman to believe, instead we live our life in fear of the aging process. A recent survey showed that almost half of all woman over-45 are afraid of wearing fashionable clothing. Instead they turn to dowdy, shapeless garments for fear of what others will say. WHY?.. it has a lot to do with the fact that main stream media and advertising refuse to acknowledge the existence of fashionable, beautiful, sexy, naturally aging women. Which leads us to believe that once we hit the dreaded age of 40 we are socially and physically undesirable. Therefore left with a sole purpose of dedicating our lives to being a mother, grandmother and husband caretaker.

But thankfully there are some woman out there who are defying the expectations that society has placed upon them. They have chosen to live their lives to the fullest, and with their own unique style. These "old" ladies should be seen as icons of our society instead of being brushed off as "that crazy weird old lady who has lost her mind". I can highly recommend this documentary FABULOUS FASHIONISTAS which follows 6 women all aged around 80 years old. They are fashionable, fun, sophisticated, beautiful woman, that have an abundance of wisdom, and passion for life and fashion. It is tremendously inspiring and fun to watch. These are women who without Botox or plastic surgery, are redefining old age, in style. Personally I think it's these types of woman that could and should be at the forefront of cutting edge fashion and media. Not only as designers but also as models and role models.



Lady Lou's Beautiful Body Tip #9:

HOW TO AVOID BEING DEPRESSED BY YOUR WINTER WARDROBE:  A woman's wardrobe often reflects not only her environment but the way she is feeling.  So it's not surprising that during the dark winter months everyone turns to black, browns, navy blues, DARK DARK DARK - Arghhh blahh so boring and dull.  Wouldn't it make more sense that the darker our environment is, the brighter we should dress? 

Here are a few tips to brighten up your dreary winter wardrobe, and I’m not just talking about pinup or Burlesque wardrobe this is for all styles...

1 - If your wearing black from head to toe try to having one item that has a pop of color.  This is especially good if it is highlighting your favourite body part - waist, legs, chest, face and hair etc.

2 - Accessories Accessories Accessories!!  Even if your clothes are dark and boring let your bold accessory make the statement.  Make the focus about one or more accessories and go big bold and fun with your earrings, necklace, bracelet, or belt. 

3 - Hats!  Don't just stick to that black woolen beanie.  Try a big, fun, stylish or crazy hat.  If they are not warm enough team them up with a pair of ear muffs.

4 - Bright tights and knee high socks.  Wearing a colorful pair of tights teamed with black knee high boots will give you that pop of color.  Or layering a pair of black transparent patterned tights over top of a colored pair can also be fun.  Or Black tights, with knee high socks and your favourite skirt can also be super cute and warm too!

5 - Last but not least - Layers!  The first form of layering is my secret tip to wearing skirts even when it's below zero outside - fleece or knit underskirts.  Make a simple warm underskirt that keeps out the cold so you don't have to wear jeans or trousers all winter. 

Layering tip no:2 heavy knits can leave you looking and feeling heavy, try layering different textures like lace, chiffon and fur over top of your knits to make them more delicate and feminine.  In the beginning it might not be so easy to find the right layers.  But be patient and eventually you should find maybe four or five pieces that work then mix and match them with other items in your wardrobe.  Secondhand stores are a good place for finding different textures that are good for layering.